Vulnerability Hangovers: Tips for Recharging Based on Your Human Design Type
Brandi Healy: this is like my 9
year old daughter's a manifester
and like, it's top of mind because
we just had recital weekend.
So it's like leading up to recital,
there's like dress rehearsals and
you know, all cast rehearsals.
Some of these rehearsals go first.
Four hours, you know, and these are
children in like full hair and makeup.
I call it the baby drag show and they
have the best time and they love it.
And like, she's.
All in, you know, over the course of a
weekend, there's, you know, could be four
or five shows, but I've seen it happen.
And now I know to plan for it the day
after recital weekend, we do nothing.
Because she's going to need,
like, a full day in pajamas, like,
watching movies and, like, napping.
And, you know, we learned the hard
way after, you know, one of the
first recitals, and then once I...
I'm like, Oh, like, yeah, she has so
much energy to get this thing going,
probably goes past her bandwidth that
like, see it all the way through.
But then like, crashes hard afterwards.
Welcome to Well Designed.
Kyle and I were just chatting.
Before we hit record and we had some
ideas of some other conversations
that we were going to have, but we
usually use, you know, a few minutes
beforehand to just catch up around
what's happening in our lives.
And, you know, the.
Sometimes I wish we were recording
during those conversations because
the things that we talk about,
Kyle Wood: I wonder if like, if, if all
like podcasts sort of like duos, like
co hosts that they all do that they
like chat before or, or, uh, actually
there's one I'm thinking of where I'm
pretty sure they, they do hit record
because like the first half an hour
of their podcast is usually pretty
chit chatty and then it gets into it.
Brandi Healy: I mean, maybe that's
something that we should try in the future
that can make for some nice outtakes.
I think, but, you know, when we were
having a conversation, Kyle and I,
uh, before we got started and hit
record, and I think it really helped
us understand, you know, let's talk
about something that's Top of mind
right now and, and, and going on for
each of us in kind of a different way.
So we just launched this podcast.
We've been collaborating for
gosh, now almost six months.
Isn't that wild?
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Yeah.
Wow.
Brandi Healy: Like from like meeting
one of just like, let's network
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Yeah.
Brandi Healy: you know,
let's work together.
You know, it's been about six months.
So this has been, you know,
some time in the making and as
excited as both of us have been.
To launch this, you know, we're kind of in
our feelings about it in different ways.
So, you know, I was just sharing with
Kyle for me when I've been working
on a big project and I've had a
couple of things, you know, going
on in my business, I launched a free
workshop for, you know, my audience,
I have this podcast that's happening.
Was, had been working really
hard on both of those things.
Got them out into the world,
and once they were like, out and
available, I just got really quiet.
I stopped talking about them, and it's
like, seems so counterintuitive to...
I guess how I felt like
I should be showing up.
So I was shooting all over myself
that I should be more excited that I
should be talking about it more that
I should be sharing about it more.
And so, you know, that's kind of what's
what's showing up for me right now.
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
I think there's so much energy
that goes into a, Project, right?
Like, so you put all this energy
into like creating a thing and then
you overcome all the resistance of
sharing that thing with the world.
And then.
Then you're out of energy.
Brandi Healy: So, I think, you know, 1 of
the things that came up for both of us, I
think was this, you know, in particular.
Podcast is so near and dear
to our heart and feels.
You know, pretty vulnerable to, you
know, put it out there and to share.
So I was like, I was just telling
Kyle, it's like, you know, I'm talking
about it, but it's like, I'm almost
like whispering about it, not too
loud, you know, talking about it
to those that are close to me, but.
You know, it, I think it's very easy
to think that resistance is coming
from a feel of fear of failure.
That's like a natural assumption, right?
Is that trying new things is
scary because we might fail.
But in part of the conversation we
were having is sometimes the scarier
part is that you might actually
succeed and get what you want.
And I think actually launching
the podcast was like the first
step to that success, right?
It's out there now.
I
Kyle Wood: Yeah, so what, for you,
if you don't mind sharing, what
does, like, what are those scary
parts of success that your, like,
I don't know, your lizard brain is?
Thinking about.
Brandi Healy: think it's the
unknown, because it's something
that I haven't experienced before.
Like, I've experienced failure, and I
know we've talked about my profile, I
have a three in my profile, which is about
experimentation, about trying different
things, and, you know, learning from
mistakes, so that's not an unfamiliar
feeling to me, and I think one of the
fears that comes with actually achieving
your goals or getting what you want is
that unknown of what comes with that.
And I think it's, then what?
I get what I want and then what?
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
For me that, yeah, yeah.
For me, that feel fear of success is
always around like, um, and you know,
I'm going to be too busy and I'm not
going to have like enough time for
the things that are important to me.
And, uh, and now, you know, as I
mentioned before, the call was also
like, people are going to see me that,
you know, I don't share publicly.
So, um, So that, that
all feels scary as well.
Uh, is it like as exciting as that
might be to be like, Oh yeah, I get to
share this side of me with the world.
It's also like, ah,
Brandi Healy: and I think that that's,
that's one of the reasons that's what
has really pulled us to working with
this modality of human design is, you
know, The permission that you get to
live often could be authentic, right?
To operate in a way that
feels in alignment, but that
doesn't mean that it's easy.
Kyle Wood: No.
So.
I thought, yeah, so we've talked about
today's episode, but we might talk
about, because this is a normal thing,
whether you've, you're just starting a
new business where you've got an existing
business and you're launching a new,
um, thing, like running a workshop or
you're doing something different to what
you maybe dabbling, you've particularly
been an offline business and now
you're dabbling with something online.
I think we all hit those, those
sort of points where the wind
comes out, goes out of our sails.
So we thought we'd talk about the
different types, human design types and
how, like what's going on there and,
and how can each type find ways to, um,
Support themselves through these periods.
Cause it is something we all go through.
It's not, it's not isolated to one person.
Uh, so yeah, then we thought
that'd be interesting topic
for today's conversation.
Brandi Healy: So, as a projector,
what do you lead into when you're
feeling the wind go out of your sails?
When your boat is slowing down.
Kyle Wood: Well, yeah, I mean, it's a,
it's that classic energy thing if the
projectors last week we launched, you
know, at the time of recording this last
week, the first episode of the podcast
came out and it also ended up being this
just like crazy week, uh, for our family
as well and, um, Like all of my energy
was going into that and probably not
near enough energy to towards relaxing.
And something I learned early on
for myself, when I would launch
a new product online for my other
business, um, I used to, this is
before I even knew about human design.
Actually, I used to like sit there and.
Then refresh my emails constantly waiting
for like the first sale to come in.
And, um, I would just end that day,
like no matter how many sales came
in, because I would tell my wife, she
would always be like, that's amazing.
No matter how many sales came
in that day, it was not enough.
And I would just feel gross
from being in front of my
computer all day and disgusting.
And so I worked out on my launch
day, you know, in an emergency, I can
always access my emails, my phone.
But I'm going to go out, we're going
to go, we're going to go see someone.
We're going to go have lunch with someone.
We're going to get out of the house.
Um, and away from my computer
and just let that first day go.
So in a way, I think, you know, I was.
Building in ways to allow
myself to relax and recharge.
After, you know, it's a huge thing
bringing out and you can, like I said,
there's all that energy that goes
into the creation of the product,
all the energy that goes into like.
Talking about it, doing whatever else
you have to do, learning new, maybe
new skills, if it's something new that
you haven't used before and, uh, yeah,
so I think that's, that's probably
the big thing it's the, I've learned
as a projector is like that classic
thing that we need, we need a rest.
We need to have that downtime after
we've used up our energy, like used our
energy on a big thing, um, and we've
probably overused our energy a bit.
To get things really good.
Yeah.
Brandi Healy: I think in retrospect,
I'm like, maybe unwise for me to have
launched two things within a week of each
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Yeah.
But it's a, it's a thing as well,
especially for like energizer predictors.
Yeah, I can do that.
But then it's like, yeah, we're
really have like dug out a big
trough energy trough for ourselves
that we need to fill back up again.
Yep.
Brandi Healy: Yeah.
And similar to you, like we had
some familial commitments happening,
you know, in our house as well.
So it was like.
Exciting things happening, you know, in
the podcast, in my own business, then
with our family, and it was exhausting.
And I think that I certainly
had, again, that moment of kind
of shitting all over myself.
And then I was able to like, really
give myself that grace and say, you
know, maybe this was poorly planned.
That's fine.
And next time, like, you know, can
we learn from Kyle and build in some
time, some time for us, like post a
big launch like this in the future.
So, you know, again, it's
that three line in action,
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Brandi Healy: and I found out,
I found out and certainly,
and certainly learned from it.
And I think that.
A really valuable lesson for kind
of all sacral open sacral centers.
So our manifestos, our reflectors,
our projectors is, you know, when
you know that you're spending a
lot of time and energy working on
something, really ensuring that you're
creating and protecting that time.
For rest, knowing that when you give
yourself that downtime, when it's
time to turn back on, you'll have
the energy to do it and operate.
Like, you know, with better quality,
because I know if I work, push myself to
work a really long day, I am not working
at the same quality in hour 12 as I did in
like, hour, like, you know, two and three.
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Yep.
So, speaking of, uh, manifests,
I think the, for them, it's gonna
be pretty similar to projectors.
Um, you know, manifestors, the classic
thing for manifestors is that they can
see the thing that needs to be changed.
Uh, they can see how things can
be done differently, but they
often lack the energy to see
that thing through to the end.
So if you're a manifestor working for
yourself and you are seeing something
through to the end, through to the launch
point, you, again, are probably going like
beyond your, like, Usual energy levels.
Yeah, your bandwidth.
And so that is going to feel very, it
can be very natural for you to then
be like, and also being a manifesto.
And this was one more thing I was
going to say for projectors, like
projectors launching something new
can often be so big to us, but quiet,
especially something brand new.
So we're not getting that like
recognition straight away as well,
which can sort of help refuel us.
Um, and that takes time.
And, and so to manifest, I think,
you know, a big thing can be because
they can be like such catalysts.
You might launch something and
like upset a lot of people as well.
People will love it, but there'll be a
lot of people who are also like, who are
you to talk about this kind of thing.
And so that could feel really
like defeating and deflating.
So I think, um, again, yeah, like
you said, for manifest is like taking
that time to step back and rest,
um, and, and like, bring people in,
um, to help them to help to give
directions to like, as soon as possible.
Brandi Healy: Yeah, you know, I think
I may have shared this before, um, but
this is like my 9 year old daughter's
a manifester and like, it's top of mind
because we just had recital weekend.
So it's like leading up to recital,
there's like dress rehearsals and
you know, all cast rehearsals.
Some of these rehearsals go first.
Four hours, you know, and these are
children in like full hair and makeup.
I call it the baby drag show and they
have the best time and they love it.
And like, she's.
All in, you know, over the course of a
weekend, there's, you know, could be four
or five shows, but I've seen it happen.
And now I know to plan for it the day
after recital weekend, we do nothing.
Because she's going to need,
like, a full day in pajamas, like,
watching movies and, like, napping.
And, you know, we learned the hard
way after, you know, one of the
first recitals, and then once I...
I'm like, Oh, like, yeah, she has so
much energy to get this thing going,
probably goes past her bandwidth that
like, see it all the way through.
But then like, crashes hard afterwards.
So 1 of our family members was like,
Oh, can we do something on Monday?
And I was like, Absolutely not.
I was like, we need to do it before.
She'll still be on the upswing if
we do it before recital weekend.
Like we can ride that wave,
but afterwards it's going to
be lights out for, for a bit.
So, you know, we're kind of in that moment
and, you know, being able to honor that,
whether you're, you know, an adult and
you're talking about your business or
you have, you know, partners or children
in your life, you know, understanding
what does that look like for them.
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Yep.
I love it.
I'm just gonna write
something down for the end.
Yeah.
All right, well, let's keep with our non
sake rules and what about reflectors?
Brandi Healy: You know, I have a
client that I've worked with that is
a reflector and I saw this, she did a
30 day challenge on her Instagram and
the whole time I, you know, it was a
mindfulness challenge and every day
I see her showing up in her stories.
I see her showing up
in her posts and like.
The content was gold, and I
remember checking in with her,
and she was like, I am exhausted.
I was like, you would never know!
And, you know, it was so interesting,
you know, she was like, I'm committed
to like, seeing this through, but like,
I'm I can see the light at the end of
the tunnel that, like, I'm allowing
that time for me to take a break and
know, like, I don't have to keep that
up and allowing for that permission
to be like, yeah, I tried this thing.
It was a lot for me.
You know, I'm, I'm able to see it through.
I know that I.
I don't feel obligated.
It's something I want to do, but
like I've kind of learned now, like
that just might be a lot for me.
Um, and I think that that's like, you
know, a good kind of observation for all
of us is whether it's an email that you
see come through from another business
that you admire or some kind of, you
know, content on social media or a
podcast, you see the finished product.
You don't see what happens behind the
scenes and you don't see the emotions
and the thoughts that are going through
the person that is putting that out.
You're like, this is awesome.
Or maybe you have another feeling
about it, but like, we always forget
that there's like a human being on
the backend that has created that and.
You know, whether that is, like,
often times we make the assumption
that it's coming with confidence.
When sometimes it's coming with a
lot, most of the time I feel like it's
probably coming with a
lot of vulnerability,
right?
Kyle Wood: of, yeah, fake it
till you make it kind of stuff.
Brandi Healy: For sure.
For sure.
I mean, I'm in this parenting gig and
we're 13 years in and I'm still faking it.
I'm waiting for that make
it part to come through.
Kyle Wood: Yep.
Yep.
Maybe if you have like eight kids
or something, you get to that point.
You just need more kids.
No thanks.
Brandi Healy: Yeah, I'm good.
Kyle Wood: I have a cousin who has,
I think she's got seven or eight.
Yeah, crazy.
So.
So, yeah.
So what did your client find helpful
to, to kind of like recharge or
Brandi Healy: Well, I know that I
knew that while she was in it, like,
once she was showing up in their
stories, once she was showing up
with her in her post, what was nice
is it was a mindfulness challenge.
So she was really practicing
what she preached.
So, if it was like a day where it was
like, go outside, she went outside,
you know, if it was a day of, like,
You know, meditate or, you know,
be in nature, take a bath, whatever
the thing was, she was doing that.
So, kind of interesting that the
thing that was making her tired
was also the thing that, you know,
she was using to kind of recharge.
Um, and so she, she did say, like,
it was a great reminder for her,
for her of all the tools that she
has, you know, available to her.
Um, and I know that she also just
gave herself a lot of grace, that it's
like, it's okay to not always feel
like, 100% on fire all the time about
every single thing that you're doing.
It's just not realistic.
And so, you know, I think for me, that
was really inspiring because I know
that there are moments where I feel
like I'm going through the motions
and to hear from another entrepreneur,
like, Hey, I go through that too.
But again, like when you're on the
opposite side of that, when you're on
the client facing consumption side,
That doesn't always come through and
you're like, this is great content.
Like this is, there's value here.
You know, this person is, is,
is providing something that
they're really passionate about.
And it's great.
So if you are the one that's creating.
Understanding that even when you might
not be operating at your highest level
that, like, you're still providing value.
And I think you could probably
speak to this as a fitness trainer.
I know.
Certainly as a yoga teacher, like,
there's sometimes been classes where
I'm like, probably wasn't my best
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Brandi Healy: afterwards.
Like, your client, like, you'll have
clients that'll be like, that's great.
I feel awesome.
And you're like, yeah.
You know, like there, I follow a trader.
Her name's Christy Larson.
And she goes, sometimes
your medium best is great.
It's still really good.
So like, you know, I, this
client was giving her medium best
and it was still really great.
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Focusing on, on being
consistent, however that looks.
Yeah.
And that actually was really helpful
attitude after I had kids because it was
like, I often did not feel my best, but
I knew if I can just show up for a little
bit today, um, that's better than nothing.
Uh, All right.
Let's let's say generators
and manifesting generators.
Let's look at that because
they've got heaps of energy.
So they never deal with,
with lulls and energy.
Do they, what a myth?
Brandi Healy: right.
What a myth.
And you know, like.
I mentioned my, my partner is a
manifesting generator and, you know,
for both generators and manifesting
generators, yes, you have heaps
of energy, as Kyle would say,
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Brandi Healy: as long as they're
doing things that light them up,
but, you know, not everything.
Lights them up all the time.
And so even in an exciting project,
even working with a client that you
really love, like there might be tasks.
or parts of that job, that
experience that are really draining.
And so, you know, there is this
myth out there that these two
types don't require energy and
it's just, it's simply not true.
And there's.
There's also other pieces of your
design that can really inform, you know,
what kind of rests that you require.
But I think when we're just staying
very broad with tight, you know, if you
are finding yourself in these moments
of putting things out into the world.
And you're kind of, you know, hitting
these, these energetic walls that we're
talking about, or finding yourself,
like, experiencing some of these limiting
beliefs, like we're talking about,
it's reminding yourself that when you
prioritize satisfaction in your life,
whether it's work related or not,
that really makes you more magnetic.
So, you know.
Can you take that beat after the launch
to do something you really love that
really makes you feel deeply satisfied
that you can invest your energy in
and say, like, when I lay down in bed
tonight, like, what is going to make me
feel like, oh, like, I used my energy in
a way that feels really good to me today
and to try to create space for that.
Kyle Wood: Yeah, yeah, because
even with the energy, you know, the
vulnerability aspect doesn't disappear.
So that's still there rearing its head.
And, you know, I'm a famous, a
famous manifesting generator, Brene
Brown talked in her second TED talk
about the launch from her first.
Ted talk.
Like after that came out and she, she
talks, if you haven't seen it, she talks
about how she, you know, got posted online
and, you know, people were watching it and
she'd been so incredibly vulnerable about
her own story, um, during the talk that
she like spent, I think like two or three
days, just like hold off on the couch.
Cause she was just like,
Brandi Healy: Peanut
butter and Downton Abbey.
That was
Kyle Wood: yeah, that's right.
A vulnerability hangover.
She coined the, or I don't
know if she coined the term.
She certainly popularized that term and
that's been very helpful for me as well.
Um, and yeah, so that
aspect doesn't disappear.
And so that's here where that bit of the.
Stuff that feels really
satisfying, which obviously for
her, watching those two TV shows.
Brandi Healy: Eating peanut
butter out of the jar
and
Kyle Wood: Yes.
There you go.
Those two
Brandi Healy: Downton Abbey, yes.
Like, what feels nourishing to you?
You know, whether that's physically,
mentally, energetically, or, you
know, who feels nourishing to you?
Like, can you carve out, like you
mentioned, you know, I'm going to go
out to lunch with these people this day.
Like, prioritizing.
The things that bring you joy,
those things that make you feel
really, you know, cared for.
And I think that's, you know, that
shows up differently for each type.
But I think that that's really kind
of, that's the common thread here is.
Within your specific type, like,
what does that look like for you, and
can you, when you, when you have the
self awareness to find yourself in
these moments, notice and say, like,
you know, I'm in this vulnerability
hangover, what would serve me right now?
Kyle Wood: Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah.
And planning, you might even want
to like plan that stuff in advance,
like knowing that that's coming block
those days out for those things.
The other thing I can imagine
for generators is, you know, lead
coming up to launching something.
There's a lot of different years, you
know, spinning a lot of plates at once.
And that I can imagine that could
feel quite draining to generators who.
Prefer to be more focused
on one thing, uh, at a time.
So I think paying attention to that and
that, yeah, like a good project that you
enjoy or you know, it could be a good way
to like direct your energy afterwards.
Don't keep trying to like notice if you're
still bouncing from activity to activity
and that that might still be making
you feel really blurred afterwards too.
So I've, I've, uh, I've written
down some, um, little summations
Brandi Healy: Let's hear it.
Kyle Wood: each type.
I'm, I'm yet to get one for
projector though, so we'll have
to work on that at the end.
So for manifestors, a pajama day is on
the cards, could be the thing for you.
Reflectors, uh, space and grace.
Brandi Healy: Oh, I love that.
I want that too.
Kyle Wood: Yeah, I don't think we can all
take a little bit from that, uh, but yeah,
I guess reflectors and also other people,
if you've got a lot of open and undefined
centers, like really playing around
that space afterwards, um, spaces that
make you feel good, that make you feel
nourished and get grace that it's, it is,
you are going to be tired for a few days.
Um, Peanut butter in downtown Abbey.
Brandi Healy: Downtown!
Downtown!
Kyle Wood: Sorry, Downton.
I've been corrected on that before.
Um, and I've even written it down,
uh, Downton Abbey, uh, for our
generators and manifesting generators.
It's okay to, um, yeah, to take
your foot off the accelerator.
Afterwards, you don't need to be
going as crazy as you have been going.
So yeah, that would be
my, my advice there.
Um, and it might only be for a
day and then you'll be twitching.
So you want to get back into things,
but yeah, give yourself that space.
Uh, and then projectors.
What's a short, um.
Thing we can say for projectors,
we should be able to work
this out as two projectors.
Brandi Healy: What's your thing?
What do you do?
What did you do this weekend?
Kyle Wood: Uh, this weekend
was still really busy.
Um, yeah.
Brandi Healy: Or was it yesterday?
Or was it yesterday?
What did you tell me
Kyle Wood: Well, yesterday I had a bit
of a manifesto day of pajamas and movies.
Um, well, I wasn't wearing
pajamas, but yeah, a blanket.
Um.
Yeah, I, you know, the, that
I think going back has, has
often been a way of recharging.
But also, um, for me, like
nature is like a big one,
Brandi Healy: Mm
Kyle Wood: getting out,
getting out in nature.
And, um, and I did, I just went for a
small, small walk yesterday, even though
I felt awful, but I knew even just a
short walk out outside would do a lot
to help me feel better and recover.
Brandi Healy: hmm.
For me, I can, when I am
kind of feeling Anxious.
Physical movement is
something that always kind of
like helps like bring me
back and like it's not always
like what you would expect.
It's not always going to be something
like super aggressive like I'm
obsessed with my foam roller.
So it could be like.
using the foam roller and like, you
know, just getting super relaxed, like
doing some restorative yoga, like pretty
much, you know, I try to carve out
like even like five to 10 minutes a day
of doing some really gentle movement.
I find really help.
It can be feel really soothing.
And like very calming and being like,
all right, like we're a bit settled.
It's not, it's not, it's not all
moving as fast as we think it is.
So we think it's like,
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
Brandi Healy: you know, anything for
both of us, it sounds like it's just
like taking that moment to slow it down.
Kyle Wood: Yeah.
And that was good.
I hope everyone listening
to this has enjoyed it.
Find it helpful to know you're not
alone when you're putting something
new out into the world and you feel a
sense of deflation afterwards or like
the wind's gone out of your sails and
that's normal and everyone goes through
this and I hope you've picked up some
something in there that will help you
recover, um, Uh, you know, I think
grace is probably for all of them.
Like don't, don't beat yourself
up about the way you're feeling.
Yeah, remember it's normal.
And the, the quicker you embrace your
type and yeah, you, the different
parts of your human design that make
up who you are, the faster you'll
find yourself back on your feet.
There we go.
If you have anything you'd
like to add Brandy at the end.
Brandi Healy: I don't know.
I think, thank you Kyle for our
chat before and helping, uh,
lifting my ass off the ground today.
Kyle Wood: Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
You're welcome.
Alright.
I'll see ya.
Brandi Healy: Talk soon.
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